4:44am

Why does my son feel the need to come wake me up at 4:44am and proceed to climb all over me while leaving his daddy alone the entire time. Is it just a mommy thing. I tell him to go back to sleep and defiantly he tell me NO. Then kicks the dog off the bed and screams at me when I get up to use the potty.

For the past week (excluding sunday) I have gotten up in the morning and worked out with Jillian Michaels for 20-25 minutes give or take. I started her 30 day shred video. It is really hard. This morning I did not want to work out. It is now day one of week 2 and apparently this is the hardest week so I need to push through so that it becomes easier. Another reason I was probably tired this morning was I decided to throw in a p90x video last night. The cardio on p90x is a pain. Well the actual cardio moves aren't bad but the yoga that he begins with amazes me. My body doesn't move that way. Maybe one day it will.

After I started this new work out routine a group of people on myfitnesspal.com got together and started a 12 week biggest loser contest. My weigh in day is Saturday so today I am going to be bad and have half a steak and cheese sub. Looks like I will be doing another p90x video to burn the calories i eat at lunch. Wish me luck.

I would also like to say Happy Birthday to my amazing friend Mandy. I love her and she makes me laugh. So heres to Mandy on her 30th birthday hope it is an amazing day. Make it count.

Old Soul

I have been told by more than one person in my life that I act older than I am. Not really sure what that means except I would imagine that the people that have told me this think I’m boring and that is a nice way of telling me. Although my brother isn’t nice about it at all he came right out one day and just said you know you are boring. I think we were talking about going to a party or something and I didn’t really want to go. I on the other hand like to think that I have an “old soul.” I like having fun. Going out and having dinner and drinks with friends, having people over the house to play games (card or board), having outings at the beach or the park, and just enjoying other people’s company are all fun activities to me.

Maybe my definition isn’t the best. According to the urban dictionary an “old soul” is:

A spiritual person whom is wise beyond their years; people of strong emotional stability. Basically, someone whom has more understanding of the world around them.

Some people even believe an old soul is a person whom has learned from past incarnations, or lives. They acquired certain knowledge from their past lives and apply it to their present life... thus gaining more wisdom than the average bloke.

I don’t think I am wise beyond my years or that I have been reincarnated from a monk. Actually when I was in grade school the Quija board told me I was a mole in my past life. How about that, I was one of those tiny little animals that my dog chases in the yard. I don’t believe that I have answers that others don’t and I am not even sure if I would want them. I don’t have a great understanding of the world and how it revolves. All I know is that I wake up every morning and make it through the day with the grace of God and hope that he will give me another one to enjoy.

Guess I have to think of a new way of describing myself. Any one have any ideas? But until then I will stick with my own version of “old soul.”

I like laid-back situations where I don’t have to get plastered to have fun but I am not stuck in a library with a book in my face. Although, now that I have a kindle I have a book in my face more than not or at least a kindle in my face. I like Paul Simon, Pride and Prejudice, Michael Jackson (before all the nose jobs). I like having inside jokes that no one else understands and still wouldn’t even if we let them in on it. I love my family and friends with a force that I don’t even understand. But I also don’t feel that I have friends that love me the same way. I know I probably do, but I tend to look down on myself and the way that others see me.

I want to bring back the dresses that women wore in “Gone with the Wind” I want men to be chivalrous. I want people to respect their elders. I want to be able to stay home with my kids (I know some women have this). I don’t want to be judged because I do something different from my friends. I want to be loved and respected.

I want to have friends that even if we don’t talk on a daily basis will make plans at least once a month to go out and catch up on the comings and goings of everyone’s lives. I miss my friends from college and I doubt I will ever talk to them again except for one who I really need to make the 2-hour drive to see. I miss her and think she is awesome.

The more I describe myself maybe “old soul” isn’t the right description maybe I am just “old school.”

The beginning

This is my first attempt at a blog. We will see how it goes. I will not be focusing on any one topic with my blog it will be my life in general. I will start with the basics. But hopefully life will be better after 30.

I love my life and overall I am very happy with the way things have turned out. I am 29, married, and have one son (hopefully more soon). I still live in close proximaty to the rest of my family. They are all supportive and crazy but they are mine and I love them. It has been a month and a half sense my last smoke and I am now going to try to loose the extra weight that I have carried all of my life. I have never been one to do things for myself. I have done things because people tell me I should and I am tired of living that way. I want to be happy with myself and by quitting smoking (on my own terms) I have come to the realization that it is possible.

I have an issue with never being able to stick with anything either. I start a weight lose journey and then give up I start a cross stich blanket for my son (still haven't finished). I find things I enjoy but them give them up because it takes time away from my husband and I feel guilty. Not that my husband minds he is content with video games and just being a home body. In a way I am a home body as well but I still like to get out and have fun and I don't feel like I have been able to do that as of late. Looks like that is another goal I have.

If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up.
Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.
- Michael Jordan

Hopefully I will be able to live up to this quote because I don't want to give up anymore.